I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
