so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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