honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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