Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
