So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
