the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
