Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Man, jail baloney is awful.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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