don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
