He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
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