4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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