South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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