We're facebook friends in real life
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
