If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
