We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I wear drunk well.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize