i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
