Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
So many bounce houses so little time
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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