so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
