Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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