I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
