I cockslap morals
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize