Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over

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  (305) 3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over http://tfl.nu/46dm
  Replies (3) Good night (745) Bad night (1951) Order T-Shirt
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  (559): View more from California

  Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs

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  (559): Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs http://tfl.nu/r642
  Replies (18) Good night (2484) Bad night (427)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.

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  (740): i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle. http://tfl.nu/qqa2
  Replies (26) Good night (820) Bad night (2618) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.

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  (775): A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins. http://tfl.nu/j7t3
  Replies (23) Good night (4616) Bad night (1038)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.

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  (231): Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward. http://tfl.nu/juz7
  Replies (18) Good night (7068) Bad night (1821) Order T-Shirt
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  (361): View more from Texas

  like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan

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  (361): like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan http://tfl.nu/pxmf
  Replies (15) Good night (2394) Bad night (851) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".

  (416): View more from Toronto

  That's about an "8" on normal scales.

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  (416): I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him". (416): That's about an "8" on normal scales. http://tfl.nu/joyf
  Replies (7) Good night (2598) Bad night (800)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.

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  (+61): There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye. http://tfl.nu/nvha
  Replies (1) Good night (1396) Bad night (1131)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina

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  (610): Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina http://tfl.nu/hqzz
  Replies (19) Good night (1980) Bad night (833) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.

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  (760): She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid. http://tfl.nu/c9kh
  Replies (2) Good night (488) Bad night (1278) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.

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  (+44): My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head. http://tfl.nu/1t8h
  Replies (8) Good night (2258) Bad night (663) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.

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  (605): And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same. http://tfl.nu/7gpg
  Replies (6) Good night (986) Bad night (535) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.

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  (210): Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course. http://tfl.nu/nbyi
  Replies (4) Good night (809) Bad night (285)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?

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  (216): So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent? http://tfl.nu/r4d5
  Replies (5) Good night (271) Bad night (919) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.

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  (901): I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy. http://tfl.nu/38oe
  Replies (6) Good night (202) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt

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