Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
