Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
