Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
