am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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