I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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