More tranny stories later!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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