Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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