Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
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I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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