we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
