Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
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