Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
