Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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