Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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