New invention idea: vibrating tampons
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize