The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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