problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
and she was petting her beer can
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
