Barsexuality is the new black.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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