We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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