Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Randomize
