Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize