Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
