I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
