why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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