go do what you do best...puke behind churches
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
