I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
