is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
