All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I want to be your penis for a week.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize