If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize