The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize