last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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