Where is the hickey?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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